Am
Walking this morning, what did I see?
 Am
I saw a leaf drop out of a tree!
 Am
Walking along after dark,
 Am
All kind of changes going on in the park
 Am           F
I'm saying yeah



"I've just got a bag of sand out of the van" (1:51)

        Am
It was a gorgeous day
            Em
Everything's going my way
       Dm                        Am
I am a man, with some sand in my van

            Am
I don't know what to do
            Em
How do may this stay through
     Dm                          Am
Gotta get it out of my van, if I can



"I'm counting screws for kitchen handles" (2:50)

 C                    Am
Good morning, how are youse?
 C                       Am
How your socks? How your shoes?
 C                                  Am
You listening to jazz, what did you choose?

 F
Oh me?

G                 C
 I'm counting screws!


"I need to buy a new toothbrush, 'cause my bristles are flat" (3:52)

(Intro) G
        Ha!

 G
Walking down the street
 C
Get a lot of wolf whistles
 G
Gotta find someone to week
 C
Gotta buy some new bristles



"Today I'm gonna walk to the postbox, I'm post about... 10 letters?" (4:42)

 C     Am              C               Am
  Yeah, all right now,  c'mon everybody, haha so right now
 C                   Am
  Just walking along, to singing my new song
 F
  Here we go...

 C                            Am
Hey I wanna contact, wanna contact my friend
 C                            Am
I got some letters that I've just got to send
 F                                          C
I got another nine people, that I want to call
                       Am
I got to write to them all
               F                       G
Writing to my friends, writing to my friends ...
                        C Am
Letter writing never ends

 C                            Am
Don't want to write them on my computer



"Plucking my eyebrows" (6:54)

 Am              F
My wife said: Tom you look so scary,
 Am                           F
Don't wanna be rude, but your eyebrows a little bit hairy
 Am                  F
I ain't the problem, don't blame it on me!
 Dm                               G
They grow much longer, you gonna struggle to see!

              Am                           F
So pluck 'em out, that's what this song's about
                    Dm                        G
Can you borrow my tweezers? Yeah you can, no doubt
                                 Am                        F
Cause some plucking my eyebrows out, that's what my days about
                   Dm                      G
Oh got your permission, to improve your vision



 Am             F
Said Tom beware, of excess bodily hair
 Dm                                G
Cause soon you gonna scare all children!